Home Day 5 - Hello It's Me................

Hi Everyone

I'm finally able to update my blog myself. My sister has done a great job keeping it up since I've been "out of commission". For those of you who know my sister and I, you know my sister Francy is much more responsible than I am - so don't expect an every day update as she has given. I have to admit I've always said I want to be just like her when I grow up - she's 12 years younger than me :0) - not possible. On a serious note, I can't begin to express how much it has meant to me to have her with me since I came home from the hospital. I feel no one could have taken better care of me. She'll be leaving on Sunday and I'll miss her so ..................

Every day I seem to get a little better. I was in more pain today when I woke up but I think that may have been due to trying to sleep in my own bed. I have a hospital bed in the living room and wanted to try my own bed for a night. I think I'm going to have to stay in the hospital bed for a while longer - lesson learned. I have cut back on my pain medication and am getting used to my "new" body. I kind of feel like the scarecrow from the "Wizard of Oz". I feel like I've been taken apart and put back together again. Remember the scene in Emerald City?

I'm more than blessed I had very talented and kind surgeons. I have very few incisions. God is good!!

My friend Karen and her son Mason came by today and introduced me to their new puppy. That was a bright spot in my day. I can't do anything right now - so it's always nice to have visitors. My friend Art brought Chinese food for dinner - I always enjoy my time with him.

It's so hard to express how much my friends and family have meant to me through all of this. I know I still have a long road ahead of me but know I can do it through faith and the love of the people around me. I get discouraged from time to time but NEVER enough to give up hope.

I know there's more I want to say - but I'm tired and it's time for my medication.

Thank you for loving me!!!

Home day 3 and 4 by Francy Thursday January 29th 2009

Well Mary Jo's recovery is going great. She is able to get up and move around really well. She still has quite a bit of pain, but has been able to cut back on her pain medication. Taking showers, eating normally (except her throat still causes her to choke some). She has gotten lots of visitors, call, some cards, plants, an edible arrangement and she appreciates and loves them all. She plans to update the blog herself, maybe even tonight. She is napping right now, but has been awake most of the day. It is hard for her to tell cuz she wants it all back to normal now, but she makes significant progress towards recovering from the surgery every day. She will see her doctors next week. Plastic surgeon on Monday for check up and to get her stiches out, Oncologist to discuss next steps for chemo on Tuesday and Surgeon for general check up on Thursday. Her chemotherapy should start in about 3 weeks (she had to wait 4 weeks after surgery). She will have 5 months of that.....then one more surgery to complete her reconstruction so keep up the prayers and postive thoughts. She needs them. She has come so far already, but still has alot to endure. More updates later....

Home Day 2 by Francy Tuesday January 27th 2009

Yesterday, Mary Jo got the most rest she had since her surgery. It was pretty quiet, no visitors after we got home and settled around 3:00 yesterday. She has an episode of increase pain and headache last night and this morning has been a little rough. She is up in the recliner and eating some breakfast. She still has some trouble swallowing from the tube she had in her throat during surgery. Today she gets to take a shower, just needs to feel a little better before tackling that. Since her surgery alot of people have asked, "so they got all of the cancer out, so why do you have to have chemotherapy"? Unfortunately lumpectomy (the orginal surguries she had) nor mastectomy cancel out needing chemo. As the oncologist explained to us, those cancer cells could have already traveled elsewhere in her body, so she must have the chemo to ensure not only survival from this cancer, but to decrease her chances of reoccurance. I know people just are curious, but this journey is difficult enough without having people question the treatment plan the doctors have given you. Please continue your support, not only does Mary Jo face weeks of recovery for this extensive surgery, she too get to endure 5 months of chemo, with hair loss and all the fun that comes with that. This afternoon has been good, up for a shower, Mary Jo feels so much better after that. Denise and Kris stopped by and Kris brought her pasta for lunch with is her favorite. She ate a great lunch and is feeling really good right now. More updates later....

Post Surgery Day 6 (Home Today) by Francy Monday January 26th 2009

Mary Jo was released from the hopital and got home around 3:00. She is settled and resting now. She had a busy day getting ready for home. She is doing well, still has quite a bit of pain. Eating better. She may even be up to starting her own blog soon. Not much else to update on right now.

Post Surgery Day 5 by Francy DeVries Sunday January 25th 2009

Talked to Mary Jo this morning and she had lots of visitors yesterday. She is mostly off the morphine pump, taking pain medications by mouth. The plastic surgeon assistant was in this morning and he said she would go home tommorrow. Brian and I got to Fort Wayne at around 7:15pm. Went to the hospital to visit Mary Jo. She was not feeling well. She has a bad headache and is sick to her stomach, did not eat dinner. She got some medicine for the "nausea" and some pain meds. At around 9:00 she feels much better, but sleepy. Getting up is tough....quite uncomfortable. We left her for the night around 9:30. We will be back to take her home in the morning. Hope to catch the doctor. More updates once we get settled at home.

Post Surgery Day 4 by Francy DeVries Saturday January 24th 2009

The plastic surgeons assistant was in today. The next steps is to wean Mary Jo off the morphine pump and onto pain mediations she can take by mouth. She also will have her catheter removed and will be expected to go back and forth to the bathroom as needed. Tenatively Mary Jo will be going home Monday. I will be on my way to Fort Wayne tomorrow, so if I am little behind on the blog, that is due to being in route. Did not talk to Mary Jo much today. She had lots of visitors and lots to do. More updates tomorrow.

Post Surgery Day 3 by Francy DeVries Friday January 23rd 2009

Talked to Mary Jo around 9:15 this morning. Her Pathology on her breasts came back "no more cancer"....Yippee!!!!!!!!! She wants to be sure that I let everyone know that she feels this it is due to everyones prayers, that this has happened (the cancer did not spread any further). Her voice is a little stronger today. The plan is for her to move out of the ICU to a regular room tonight. Dr Morrison (Plastic surgeon) said she is recovering great, nothing could be better. Her main issue now is pain control. That have to get her to the point that pain pills will keep her pain under control. Her IV did infiltrate (go bad) so they had to start a new one, which Mary Jo hates....well everyone hates being stuck, but I think right now Mary Jo hates it more than the average person. Latest update around 4:00 is that Mary Jo is getting ready to go back to bed after being up in the chair for almost 4 hours. She is tired. Mary Jo IV situation went from bad to worse. Her IV went bad a total of three times. The good news is they were able to start using the new port they placed during surgery (this port will be used for chemo too). She moved from the ICU to the "general" floor. She is not in room 607. A nice big private room. Next update tomorrow.

Post Surgery Day 2 by Francy DeVries Thursday January 22nd 2009

Mary Jo had a rough night last night. The staff was unfortunately not as attentive. She was left with an empty morphine pump for 20 minutes. If ya haven't seen her already, just so you know she has a "weak" voice due to the tube they put in your through when she was "put under" for surgery. Time will bring her voice back. This morning she has a pretty bad headache, so they are getting her something for that (around 9:00). Dr Morrison (plastic surgeon) was in and said that she is doing good. She has good blood flow to her "new" skin, which is exactly what they want. He has asked the nursing staff to wash her hair, cuz it itches badly. She will remain in the ICU until Friday evening or Saturday morning. She is in room 1105. Talked to Mary Jo around 2:00 and she going to be getting ready to get up, she is really tired and still has a headache. For those that plan to visit her please do not wear perfume or perfume lotions, it is really bothering her. Mary Jo is pretty tired today, nurses are limiting visitors and letting her sleep. At 5:30 Mom and Dad going to see if she is awake. Talked to Mary Jo later in the evening. She was able to get up today and get her hair washed. She also got some medication for the upset stomach and that not only made her stomach feel better, but her headache too. More updates tomorrow.

Post Surgery Day One by Francy DeVries - Wednesday January 21st 2009

Today I spoke to Mary Jo by phone around 7:30am. She was anxious waking up in the ICU alone. Through the night they have monitored her skin "flaps" (that is what they call the skin they used for her reconstruction). They also monitored her blood count and did drop some so she had to get a blood transfusion this morning. The blood transfusion will ensure the best best blood flow to her new skin. She is quite a bit of pain, but has a morphine pump. Today the plan is to get her up for a little bit and allow her to eat something. She has not been sick to her stomach and is in good spirits, but as would be expected is overwhelmed by it all. Just remember she loves visitors. Her surgeon was in and reconfirmed everything went well with the mastecomy and that the results of the breast pathology will be back by Friday (they send them off for more testing to check everything even the left breast which did not appear to be cancerous). At 9pm Mom called and said that the plastic surgeon was in the afternoon/evening and he said everything looks great. He wants her monitored closely (the reconstructed skin) so she might be the ICU until Friday or Saturday. She did get up in the chair today for almost 2 hours. I here she had quite a few friends in today, sorry since I am not there I don't want to misquote on who, but thanks, I know she really appreciates it. More updates tommorrow.

Surgery Day by Francy DeVries- Tuesday January 20th 2009

Today Mary Jo had to be at the hospital around 7am for her surgery. I spoke to her around 8:15 and they were prepping her for surgery. At 9:00am she was taken back for surgery. Amanda, Mom and Dad at her side. Surgery started at 9:14. At around 11:15 the surgeon came out to provide an update. The mastectomy part of the procedure is done with no complications. The 2 plastic surgeons have now started with an expected 6 more hours of reconstructive surgery. At 12:00 the nurse came out and said that things were going fine with the plastic surgery (reconstruction). At 1:30 the nurse reported that both plastic surgeons are working on the left side and all is going well. At 3:00 the left sided surgery is complete and the right side is started, the tummy surgery will be to follow. At 4:30pm the update was just that there was about one hour to go. 5:30 Plastic surgeon is on his way out to talk to Amanda, Mom and Dad. 5:45 Plastic surgeon reports surgery is done and Mary Jo is on her way to the intensive care unit (standard procedure). He reports her surgery went great with no complications, but she needs to be in the ICU to be monitored closely (as expected). If her recovery goes well she will go home in around 5 days (sometimes more like 7 - 10 days). Mom, Dad and Amanda can see Mary Jo around 6:30. 7:00pm Mom, Dad and Amanda were able to see Mary Jo. She is awake and coherent, she is on a morphine pump for pain. She is being funny as usual asking "am I completely flat", she wants to go to "Victoria Secret to get new bras" and she said "If I say something stupid, tell me to shut up". 9:00pm Mom and Dad at Mary Jo's house for the night. Mary Jo needs her rest, I will give my next update tomorrow.

Monday Jan.12th - Monday Jan.19th - Preop Celebration

It's been a week since I've updated this and have had several inquiries. So - I'll bring everyone up to date. Aside from a couple of doctor's appointments, I worked all week. That made me feel happy and productive.

On Tuesday, Jan. 13th I went to Parkview for all of my pre-admission testing and blood work. Oh how I love to have blood drawn - not - I'm a "hard stick" - so it's never fun. On Friday, Jan. 16th I had to have blood drawn for genetic testing. I don't know who came up with the idea of everyone sitting in the same room to have their blood drawn without a curtain or anything - but I think that's torturous. I, for one, don't like to see other people in pain. That was a tough morning. It's hard for me to think of the possibility of testing positive for the genetic mutation. That will increase my daughter and sister's chances of having breast and/or ovarian cancer. I don't know how to explain it except for it makes my heart heavy.

The rest of the day Friday was great! I had the opportunity to visit my favorite ladies at "Crazy Sisters Coffee" to end my day. Then, Friday night we had a Pre-op Celebration at Columbia Street West. I was blessed at the number of of people that were there to surround me with love. There were some people who couldn't make it but I knew they were there in spirit. My sister and her husband surprised me by driving 6 hours from Illinois!!! As soon as I figure out how to add a video to this blog you'll be able to see all of the pictures. In the meantime I'll add a couple of pictures.

I didn't do a whole lot on Saturday. My daughter has been staying with me since Thursday - which has been a great joy to me. I spent a very peaceful Saturday evening with a good friend - it was exactly what I wanted to do and where I wanted to be. I went to church on Sunday - which always gives me great peace -and lunch with good friends. That brings me to today, Monday Jan. 19th.

Today is the day before my surgery. To say I have anxiety is an understatement. I've prayed all day and have asked God for peace and strength. I'm most concerned about the people who love me - my daughter, my family, my friends. I want them to feel comforted - especially my daughter. I know she feels great deal of responsibility because she's my only child. I want that feeling lifted from her. Please pray for her and keep her in your thoughts.

I went to the plastic surgeon today. He had to make the markings on me for where my general surgeon will make the incisions. That was pretty daunting - everything is very real now. Amanda (my daughter) went with me -she's such a trooper. They were very good about letting us both know what to expect.

It's 4 am and I haven't gone to sleep. Please pray for my precious daughter that she'll feel the love and comfort I feel from God and those around us. She's so brave - but she absolutely needs some extra, tender loving care.

Good night - and please visit me. One of my fears, no matter how unrealistic, is that I'll be forgotten once I'm in the hospital. I know - I'm a goofball. Hope to see you soon!

God is good! Be at peace - and remember - "Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away". Thank you for showing me the kind of love that takes my breath away. May you feel the same love coming from me to you.

Sweet dreams!

Tour of Cancer Services of Northeast Indiana

I haven't updated this for a few days - so I'm going to cover the last 4 days.

On Thurs., January 8th I toured Cancer Services of Northeast Indiana. What a wonderful place for someone like me. They offer a lot of services for free that I would have to pay for otherwise. I can get anything from bandages and tape to wigs to wheelchairs etc. They're completely not for profit and I feel blessed to have been told about this resource. What a wonderful altruistic service they offer - one that is definitely needed by me. Touring the facility made the reality set in that I really do have cancer. I have to admit it was a difficult day for me - but at the same time it was a relief to know they can help me. It seems every day is another humbling experience for me.

I had a great day at work on Friday, January 9th. I signed a contract with a new client - so I felt like an asset to my employer. That's important to me. They've been good to me and I want to make every moment I can work count. After work I went out with friends who love me. That always lifts my spirits.

On Saturday, January 10th friends came over to help me take down my Christmas decorations. What a great help! Then that night my friend Sandra and I met to go over some details for the benefit she's planning for me. I honestly didn't know I had so many friends. I can't say enough how humbling it's to allow people to love me through this. That isn't easy for me.

Today, Sunday, January 11th I started my day by going to church. I love Pathway Community Church. The topic this month is "What would you do if you had 30 days to live?" That's a pretty heavy topic - but at the same time enlightening. The topic for the sermon was "Love Deeply". I think we all forget - from time to time - how very important it is to love expecting nothing in return - to love with our whole heart as God loves us. My favorite saying is - "The greatest thing you'll ever learn is to love and be loved in return." After church I went to lunch with my friend MJ who I know - without a doubt - loves me - good and bad.

So, I'm going to leave you with the assignment my pastor gave us today - Do an act of love this week for someone you love or for someone who would never expect it from you. I'll add this - do it more than once :0) I can't think of a better way to spend your week.

Blessings to you!

I love you!

Mary Jo

Thank God - No Doctor's Appointments Today

Today was a very eventful day in the realm of being grateful for every moment. I'm blessed. I went to work - yippee. I look forward to every full day I can work. I met with a client - "Crazy Sisters Coffee" and had a great time talking with them. There are people who bring positive energy by being in their presence - these women definitely do that for me. Bless them!

I went to dinner with a friend and it was a lovely evening. Great conversation and enjoyable company. What a great way to end my day!!

As I reflect on my day I feel I need to mention my church family. It is difficult for me to express how I feel because I've only been involved in this church for a short time. It's humbling to know people are willing to reach out to me when they know so little about me. God's love for us is beyond words!

A little history - just enough - hopefully - not to bore you. I started attending Pathway Community Church two weeks before I found my first lump. I knew I needed something more in my life. Ever since I reached out to the church, they've been right beside me. Pastor Ron, Pastor Bieberstein, and other members of the church have made me feel like I'll never have to be alone again. I couldn't ask for a more supportive church family. God is soooooo very good!!! I will never underestimate His healing power. I'm so blessed to have found such a wonderful church. I'm getting more involved every day.

That's all for tonight! Sweet dreams to all.

God bless, Mary Jo

Final Meeting with the Plastic Surgeon

I met with the Plastic Surgeon yesterday - Dr. Morrison - what a kind man. We finalized all of the paperwork for my surgery on the 20th. It all seems so surreal to me. Even though I have many friends surrounding me, sometimes I feel very alone -especially in the middle of the night. I never dreamed I would have to go through something like this without a spouse. Those of you who know me, know how much it meant to me to be married.

Oh well......that being said, I'm strong and have a wonderful support group of friends behind me. I'm not the best at reaching out - so thank you so much for reaching out to me. My family has also been a great support - especially my precious daughter. She is definitely the number one reason I want to fight this with everything I have. I'm very proud to be her mom.

Have a peaceful day!

ox mj

The Beginning of My Journey - November 2008

First of all, I want to thank Felisa Davis-Stein for setting up this blog page for me. I would also like to give a big thanks to my friend Sandra Fouty for sending email updates to my friends. She's been right by my side every step of the way. Of course there are other friends - too many to list - who've been very supportive. Please know your love and support means everything to me. My friends and family are the bright spot of my life.

From now on, I hope this blog will help keep everyone informed.

The beginning of my journey with breast cancer started on Saturday, November 8, 2008 when I discovered a lump in my right breast. I went to my general doctor on Monday, November 10th. On Tuesday, November 18th I had a mammogram, ultrasound, and five biopsies at the Breast Diagnostic Center. On Thursday, November 20th I was diagnosed with DCIS (Ductal Carcinoma in Situ - noninvasive breast cancer). On Monday, November 24th I had lumpectomy surgery. On Tuesday, December 2nd I found out the margins weren't clear (cancer cells were still present ) from the surgery. They also found out, from the pathology report from the lumpectomy, the mass tested positive for invasive breast cancer. A second surgery would be necessary to clear the margins.

On Tuesday, December 9th a second surgery - re excision - was performed. I met with the oncologist on Thursday, December 11th and found out I'll have to have 20 weeks of chemo - 16 treatments. I have triple negative breast cancer (if you are interested in knowing what that means you can google it - don't want to bore you with the details). Even though my cancer hasn't spread to the lymph nodes, they're treating me very aggressively like it has - due to the triple negative factor, spreading of the cancer in the same breast and family history.

On Tuesday, December 16th I met with the surgeon and another lump in the same breast was discovered. On Tuesday, December 23rd I had an ultrasound and 4 biopsies on the second lump. Friday, December 26th I found out the biopsy was positive and the surgeon recommended a double mastectomy. After much research and discussion with family and friends - I concurred.

I met with the surgeon, oncologist and plastic surgeon on Tuesday, December 30th to discuss the plan for the next several weeks/months. It was very surreal going over the surgery options with the plastic surgeon. The thought of having my breasts removed is overwhelming - but getting new ones doesn't sound too bad at my age. :0)

I'm meeting with the plastic surgeon today Monday, January 5th to have my history and physical and go over everything prior to surgery. I will have a double mastectomy Tuesday, January 20th at Parkview Main Hospital. I will be in the hospital for a minimum of five days. Visitors are welcome. It helps my spirits to have the people I love around me!

Well, if you've read this far, that's all for now. I'm keeping a positive attitude and know, without a doubt, God is good!! As always, thank you for your love. I feel it daily. Don't hesitate to keep in touch with me. I welcome phone calls, emails, blog comments, etc. I, or someone else, will continue to keep this blog updated.

God Bless!

Love, Mary Jo