One of the Many Faces of Cancer

Hi Everyone

First, I hope the picture doesn't disturb you - or - if it does - I hope you recognize the reality of this disease. Second, I need to apologize, once again, for not keeping up with my blog. Believe me I've heard it from a lot of people. One person told me they were going to get my password and make things up so I would be "shamed" into an update. So - here it is. This is for you Mary and

Sue :0).

I've been asked by several people to show the difficult side of cancer. I have great faith but some days my faith is truly tested. As you can see by the picture, I wasn't feeling well that day. That was the day after my head was shaved due to my hair really falling out.

The day my hair fell out was the first day I was really angry about having cancer. I woke up that morning and my pillow was covered with hair. I would rub my head and my hand would be covered with hair. I took a shower and the shower floor was covered with hair

I cried most of the day. I cleaned my whole apartment in anger. I really thought I was prepared for my hair loss. Several weeks before this my daughter shaved my head. I don't know what I was thinking but I thought I wouldn't even notice when all of my hair really fell out. To say I was angry is really an understatement.

My head was on fire. I couldn't wait to shave what little was left on my head. Thanks to Theresa for stepping up to the plate and offering to shave my head. I still don't like being bald - but I'm learning to accept it. Humor seems to get me through most of the time.

Cancer is lonely - especially when you live alone. I haven't been good at letting people in but I need you. I have a lot more to add - but not tonight. I need some rest. God bless you and know that you're loved :0)